How Not to Write Your Novel: Human Target

Comic book characters have been having a very good run lately, and Human Target rides the wave handily.

Mark Valley (and his jaw) play Christopher Chance, a man with a nefarious past seeking redemption. I have to say, it seems to be a fruitful collaboration – Valley (and his jaw) look like they could have stepped right out of the pages of Action Comics. Chiseled doesn’t begin to do justice to this fella’s features. I suspect he’d be perfectly at home on the beach at Easter Island if not for the whole ‘buried up to the neck’ thing.

He’s teamed up with Chi McBride, who plays Chi McBride, though in this case he goes by the very clever alias ‘Winston’. Chi-Winston is a former cop who’s decided to abandon his life in law enforcement to pursue a career as a sort of  combination guardian angel/external conscience for Our Hero Chance (and his jaw). Of course, since he IS Chi “Winston” McBride, he also has a hefty bit of comedic outrage and exasperation to tote. It’s only natural, after all.

And then there’s Jackie Earle Haley who is squeezing every last mile out of that Rorschach gig that he can. JEH plays Guerrero, the Id to Chi’s Superego. Guerrero’s the guy with dirty hands and crazy eyes. He’s that little guy, you know the one – the little guy that did really well in biology because he wanted to make sure that when he grabs your nuts he knows just how hard to pull to keep you pliant and functional. He knows where your buttons are, and he’s more than happy to push whichever one gets him what he wants.

All together, they make a good team. Valley(and his jaw) are very easy to watch, Chi’s no big surprise, and Jackie gets to say ‘Dude’ a lot and be intimidating without hitting anybody. Is it brilliant? Nah. But it is entertaining.

FINAL VERDICT: Cat Vacuuming gives Human Target 4 out of 5 Hairballs. It’s a damn sight better than finishing your novel!

And that’s the skinny, kids. Be good. Eat your vegetables. And whatever you do…

DON’T WRITE

*Human Target airs on FOX. Check local listings for time and dates.